“emotional whiplash”

Ramblings of Sheldon

it was giving me flashbacks, not because of the violence, but because the lines that he used were the exact same lines that were told to me as a child.”

“The book is the brilliant work 13:24 by M. Dolon Hickmon. An investigation into a brutal string of murders in a small town leads to all the town’s dark secrets spilling out. One of the biggest secrets is a minister who openly advocates child abuse from the pulpit, and whose ideology is remarkably similar to real life fundamentalist leaders.

There were scenes were the minister’s son, Josh (who later becomes a lead singer of a death metal band) was having flashbacks to the beatings his father gave him. It was so raw, so vivid, that it was giving me flashbacks, not because of the violence, but because the lines that he used were the exact same lines that were told to me as a child.

There were so many profound statements that really spoke to me through the character Josh. A friend of his asks while he is in a mental hospital due to a suicide attempt and cocaine use. His friend asks them if he wants to bring back an old band that they used to have, he said he wasn’t sure about that, and his friend said he used to be passionate about the music. This was his response:

I don’t have a clue what I am passionate about because my father stripped away every shred of independence. It was never enough to follow orders. He had to pry me open, to make sure I didn’t have any feelings or motivations that he hadn’t given me permission to have.

Then, in a scene during a group therapy session for survivors of religious abuse, he talks about why he can’t believe in Christianity anymore.

“I was raised to believe that  there was a God, who loves and helps people. I believed  that, and I prayed, with the faith of a little child. God was supposed to listen; but year after year my father stood in his church, daring him to intervene. God never did a single thing. He never lifted one finger to help or comfort me”

When a Christian woman in the group become offended by this, implying that she thought he wanted everyone to become atheists, this is what he said:

I’m not saying that. I’m saying that we don’t always get to believe what we want. Somehow we have to reconcile our desire to believe with the reality we have seen.” 

More and more of Josh’s words described so much the way I have felt….

- Read the entire review of 13:24 – A Story of Faith and Obsession by M. Dolon Hickmon

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